And the worst blogger of the week goes to.....

ME!!!

So sorry guys....it's been a crazy week. So I discussed a "Tackle It Tuesday"...well, that theme has continued throughout the week. We've decided that we're going to put our house on the market after the holidays, which means we've got a LOT to do in just over a month (we're in NY over Christmas--so the last 2 weeks of December are shot). So yeah...that's what I've been doing. I've even been so obsessed that I decided to spend my birthday (Friday, the 13th---creepy, I know) taking on the war against the creatures under the bathroom sinks. PLEASE tell me some of your sinks look like mine!! I don't even know how they've managed to stay shut with the amount of crap under there. Seriously....is it even possible for me to have any more lotions, sprays, hair products??? Thanks to former students and Christmas presents...I've got Bath and Body Works under my sink (if only it could hold its weight around here and bring in some profit). Guess we know what all the ladies I know will be getting this Christmas (Mom, just because you're reading this doesn't mean you can't act surprised when you get a full set of lotion, spray, and body wash. Oh, you should also act oblivious to the fact that 1/4 of it is gone!!). So I've cleared out a good amount of my stash and my sinks are slightly more organize...but still full to the max. Oh well....I tried!!

Did I mention I'm currently typing this blog from the guest bedroom CLOSET?? I know, totally ghetto. But I just think we're taking a hint from IKEA and developing our own space saver. Yes, I realize this pimpin' set-up probably won't be able to stick around when we actually open our doors to buyers, but our guest room was functioning as a bedroom/office. Darling Dearest is not about to part with his man den completely (yes, the TV in here is going to have to head to storage too--spacious rooms, right??), so here the desk will stay tucked neatly away in our little clothesless closet. The sad thing is....it's kinda cute! You'd still consider a house with a desk in the closet, right?? Ok, we still have our laptop....but I've already staked my claim on DELL and I don't know how I feel about him two-timing me with my husband. Things get messy that way.

So yeah, this week has been spent in my PJs as I've been de-cluttering like a mad woman. I only wish Bug hadn't decided to start crawling before we embarked on this journey. It's quite the experience attempting to entertain her while keeping her out of trouble/danger (haven't been 100% successful--but that's for another post) AND getting stuff done around the house. Gone are the days where I could sit her in her exersaucer and do some dishes while she squawked and squeeled (if you knew Bug, you know she makes such high-pitched sounds that only dogs understand). Now she wants to be on the move exploring every facet of the house at ALL times. Needless to say, I'm relieved when it's time for her nap so I can really concentrate on my work. Full disclosure: showering is one task (and yes, it's definitely become a "task" lately) that I haven't fit it as often as I should. How gross am I???

If this picture isn't pathetic enough (and if you're still reading this post while ignoring the fact that you just puked up in your mouth while reading of my nasty self), I seem to have gotten a case of serious project ADD. Now I question whether this is something that just has gone undiagnosed, because I AM all over the place. And being a teacher, I've seen plenty of ADD....and I can totally identify with those little guys. Case in point: Tonight, I was talking to Cleopatra's cute little hubby about real estate when I glanced up at my mirror and in mid-sentence of talking to him, I said to Cleopatra, "Oh, I'm going to put a floating shelf under there," (yes, I DO need her input when it comes to the decor of my house given the fact that hers looks like a model home and mine needs to) then I continued talkingwith her hubby as if I had not totally interupted myself. How ADD am I??

Speaking of.........Where was I going with this? Back to my my original topic--my project ADD. I've been all over my house de-cluttering, but NOTHING is done. I start boxing up books in my room to put in storage when I remember that there are books in the guest room that I should add. So I go to the guest room, get those books, then start on something else in the guest room, which reminds me of something I need to do in the kitchen...then I start on something in there. Do you see where I'm going with this?? Do you feel my spastic insanity?? Do you understand why I have the worst case of project ADD there is?? I've been working my butt off for a week and what do I have to show for it?? A house that looks like a tornado ran through it---piles everywhere (to get boxed, to go to Goodwill, to get put away, etc), in every room!! UGH! It's making me stressed just typing this.

My kitchen pantry, cabinets, and cupboards are all done and organized...but my countertops have some random things on them in the "garbage" and "Goodwill" piles. Kitchen--UNCHECK!! My bedroom--my closet is done (oops, except for one pile of dress pants that I won't be wearing anytime soon--hello jobless--that couldn't fit in one of my packed bins and need to go in another for storage), my dressers (oops, no...they're 1/2 done too), my master bath sink (all the drawers except for my ridiculous make-up drawer---who can even organize that thin drawer in the middle anyway?? HELP PLEASE!).....oh, and I haven't even touched the cleaning aspect. Master bedroom---UNCHECK!! Guest bedroom still has a couple piles, and we've already discussed the desk in the closet---UNCHECK!! Bug's room only has a few things---UNCHECK!!. My garage---oh, I can't even talk about the mess that is, but I've made a dent in it. Why?? Because I have project ADD and am doing EVERYTHING, but finishing NOTHING. What's worse is that I still have all this de-cluttering & cleaning to do and today, I'm out shopping for finishing decor for staging (thanks to my new 24/7 obsession with HGTV--seriously, if you're not into it....it's what all the cool kids are doing. Jump off the bridge with us!!) and contemplating paint colors!! What in the world?? Somebody stop me!! I need some serious intervention! I'm a hot mess and someone needs to put me in my place.

I've decided that no matter how it gets done--project ADD or the one-room-at-a-time approach (like SHOULD be done), it WILL get done this week. All of my de-cluttering and spotless cleaning MUST get done this week. Why?? Because I said so! Didn't your mother ever tell you not to ask why? And hey, I may even add "shower" on my list of things to do (Bug and I have appts on Mon. and Wed---so that's 2 days out of 7, right??). And I leave you with that---the epitome of a hot mess!!

Randomness

I know it's been a couple days since I've blogged, but things have been crazy in this household. So this is going to be a random list of all you've missed in the last couple days---since I'm that exciting (can you sense the sarcasm??).

**Bug is all over the place. This week she has morphed into a little super baby. (Yes, I'm aware that it's totally normal progression....but I'm her mom, so Super Baby she is.)  Like I said earlier, she started crawling this week to chase Cleopatra's shoes. Since then, I have found her crawling down the hall with leaves brought in by one of my dogs in her mouth . I was sooo tempted to take a picture for the blog, but my internal monologue went something like this, "Wow, Mom of the Year, you already have a Bug with leaves in her mouth and have won a M.O.T. Y. award for that. Do you really need to win another one for choosing a blog photo over getting the leaves out??" Would've been cute picture though. :-)

This same week, she managed to pull herself up in her crib, take down the video monitor that was a good 5 inches away on the wall, and toss it on the floor when she should've been napping.  She's already letting us know that we're all up in her personal business. I mean, haven't we heard of an 8 month old's need for privacy? RUDE!! Super Baby has also been trying to fly this week and had I not had a firm grip on that diapered behind, she would've----right into the ground. She grabs the edges of the bed to pull herself off head-first in order to check out the scenary below. This means, I'm holding her butt at the top of the bed while she's got 1/2 of her body off the bed. This girl is fast, which means I need to move faster. No head injuries YET! :-) 

So I realize you all don't really care about the fact that Bug is doing what all babies her age are learning to do SUPER BABY, but....this blog is also my form of a diary, so you get to read stuff you don't care about while I get to document these little things that make me amazed by all God's little miracles in her life. I mean, it's amazing that 8 months ago she couldn't even hold up her own head. These little things we take for granted are huge strides for our little ones---but you all know that. You know the feeling of unabashed joy, the sound of angels singing, and the rays of sunshine that fill up the room when your baby goes from constipation to a beautiful blow-out up to their neck!! Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, right??

**On to random topic #2--yesterday's Pampered Chef get together. So this is the main reason I haven't posted in a couple days---parties stress me out! It's a lot of work for ME to attempt to become Cleopatra (remember that post??). Things that involve entertaining that are common sense to most people, are not to me. I grew up in a small town with a big family where people just dropped by all the time. My birthday parties were wings and pizza, a boxed vanilla cake with chocolate icing (no decorations other than candles that counted your years)...and all on paper plates--WHITE ones. No clever themes, goody bags, blow up slides. There was none of this "presentation" or cutesy entertainment. We were the definition of casual (and "casual" is putting it nicely). So needless to say, trying to be cutesy and homemakerish is not my cup of tea. Don't get me wrong, I'd LOVE it if it were because I admire that in people...but it's going to take me some time to get there, and by "time" I mean MIRACLE! I love white paper plate girl who doesn't care, but I also love Cleopatra. Is there a way to be a Cleopatra who doesn't care or stress out with these things??

Overall, our little get-together went off pretty well. One of my besties came up to help me--another one who's good at entertaining. Love you, N! Cleopatra was out of town, but called me to make sure I was feeling good about things--love her! My husband managed to stay married to me and even endured the pre-party, stressed-to-the-max, bossy me. I didn't think I'd turn into that person but between little things to finish around the house, a baby who needed to eat, and a P.C. consultant who needed my assistance with her set-up (most MY responsibilities)...an ugly side of me came out with my Darling Dearest. "Honey, can you do this?? Hey, I need you to move this! Can you hide this upstairs where everything else that doesn't have a place has gone in preparation for this party bring this upstairs?" I mean, can I BE more annoying (said in my best Chandler voice)?? Does Cleopatra act like that before a party, or is she cool and together, sipping on a glass of wine and waiting for her guests to arrive since everything was finished hours beforehand??? Needless to say, I got to see some awesome people I haven't seen in a while, ate some delicious food, saw some pretty cool gadgets that I can't afford since I'm not working, and had an overall great time!! On top of that, I'm still married and my husband still loves me....until my next attempt at entertaining.

And we're off......

This post is going to be short and sweet (for the record, whenever I say this type of thing, it always ends up the opposite--probably because of extra details I put in parentheses). I think Bug has officially become a crawler!! Now, she's been taking random crawling "steps" here and there this week--normally 3 at a time. But tonight, she was on a roll. What inspired all this action?? Cleopatra's silver, shiny heels (yes, my awesome friend came over to help me get my house cutesy for a get-together this weekend and even brought her fall decor)!!!

So here's the play-by-play:

Cleopatra took off her heels to stand on one of my chairs, and before she had even gotten the second shoe off, Bug's eyes were saucers and she CRAWLED toward that little piece of metallic heaven with a passion and persistence I have never seen. And she got it!!! So I moved it farther, partly because who wants their daughter chewing on some one's shoe and mostly because I wanted to see her little booty shake across that floor again to capture her a sexy heel. SHE DID!! I even completely changed directions and moved it AGAIN. There was no stopping her. That hot little number of a shoe kept her interest the entire night. Did I mention that she had toys surrounding her?? None of which interested her in the slightest once she found that shoe. I was sooo excited, I almost gave her that shoe she worked so hard to get and let her chew her little heart out....ALMOST!

So from this exciting milestone, I've drawn a few conclusions:

1. My little bug loves her some sexy heels!
2. She likes girlie things with some sparkle and shine (don't we all??).
3. She was trying to steal my very-put-together friend's cute shoes because she feels bad for her mother and the shoes she attempts to pull off (some with nails coming out that they wreck one of her best friend's mother-in-law's wood floor at a baby shower--YES, that happened--some with the wedge completely worn down that the "heel" is rounded and impossible to walk in, some with inserts that are coming out, some with the sole disconnecting from the toe, etc.). Yes, my Bug is embarrassed of the shoes I not only own, but attempt to wear and pull off, no less!!! Who does that??? Good thing I took advantage of my 50% off Oprah coupon to Payless this weekend and got some flats that are in shape...FOR NOW!

SO with her new skill, I'm thinking of putting her to work at my party on Saturday and maybe catching myself some new pairs of shoes. Ladies, hold on to your shoes.....I've got a Bug, and I know how to use her!!

PS. So much for short and sweet..........see what I mean??